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　　The flip side of ‘going Dutch’

　　进餐AA制的尴尬

　　I went to a friend’s birthday dinner recently. Two of her other friends organized it. I had a good time. I think time spent is one of the most precious commodities nowadays, and I was honored to be invited to celebrate with her.

　　最近我参加了一个朋友的生日聚会，是她的另外两个朋友组织的。我玩的很开心。我认为时间是当今社会最为宝贵的商品之一，能被邀请参加她的生日会，我感到很荣幸。

　　However, there was one aspect of the evening that left a bad taste in my mouth.

　　不过，那天晚上有一件事让我心中有些不是滋味。

　　Her friends decided that everyone would share the bill, but it was not explicitly stated until it was time to pay. I got to the dinner over an hour late, checked the menu for something that was within my budget and ordered. Forty-five minutes later, it was time to pay the bill, and I was told how much my part was. The person next to me said, "But you just got here." I was thinking the same thing, but kept quiet. I had not eaten any of the food they had been eating for almost two hours.

　　她的朋友们决定帐单AA制，但却是直到买单时才说明。我到达时本来就已晚了一个多小时，看了看菜单，并点了些我预算之类的东西。45分钟后，结帐时间到了，他们告诉我我应该分摊多少。我旁边那个人说，“你不是才到一会儿嘛。”我也正是这样想的，但我保持沉默。他们吃了近两个小时的东西，我一样也没碰过。

　　I thought to myself, "It’s your friend’s birthday, and you want to hang out. The extra money you give is paying for her meal. Don’t you want her to have a happy birthday?"

　　我对自己说，“这是你朋友的生日，你愿意出来陪伴。你多出的钱是为她的生日聚餐，难道你不想她过一个快乐的生日吗?”

　　We paid and moved to a club, and the same thing happened. I was asked to pay for drinks I did not drink. Again, I paid without a word.

　　结帐后，我们又去了一个酒吧。同样的情况又发生了。我被要求付那些我并没有喝的饮料。我一言未发，还是照付了。

　　"It’s her birthday. She would do the same for me," I told myself.

　　我对自己说，“这是她的生日。她也会为我这么做的。”

　　I am not used to splitting the bill. It is not my culture. I am used to paying for my own meals, and I resent being roped in last minute to cover other people’s excess. In a birthday dinner scenario, we would all cover our own cost and then pool our funds to cover the birthday person’s bill.

　　我不太习惯AA制，它不是我的传统。我通常都会为自己买单，我讨厌在最后一刻被绑架，去为别人的消费付钱。在生日聚会上，我们往往都会自己的消费买单，并集资去为寿星买单。

　　I paid and pushed that niggling distaste aside only to wake up the next day to a text asking for money!

　　我付了帐，不再去想这个令人厌恶的事，第二天早上醒来，却收到一条信息来要钱!

　　They paid using the WeChat’s "Go Dutch" function, which allows a group of people to split the bill. I had given someone cash and asked them to forward it to the person collecting, which they did. So, why was I being texted hours later, especially after I posted in the same group saying that I had paid through such and such person?

　　他们使用了微信的“AA制”功能付钱，可以让一群人分摊帐单。我昨晚已经付了现金，请他们转交给那个负责收钱的人。那么，为什么在几小时后又发信息来收钱，尤其是，我已在这个群里说明，我将钱交给给某某人了?

　　WeChat’s Go Dutch function works well for some groups. I have seen many use it successfully - no fuss, no muss. But in those cases, people discussed it among themselves before they ordered.

　　对于某些群体来说，微信的“AA制”功能运行良好。我见过很多人成功的使用它——有条不紊的。不过在那些情况下，人们在付帐前已预先商议好了。

　　For me, more often than not, this is not the case. The last time something like this happened, it was another birthday dinner. Some people ordered expensive shrimp, beef and wine, and then rushed to "suggest" splitting the bill later. Seriously! How about you try living within your means!

　　对我来说，情况往往并非如此。上次发生这种情况时，是在另一个生日聚会上。一些人点了很贵的龙虾、牛排和葡萄酒，然后起哄“建议”大家平分帐单。真的是无语啊!为什么不能量入为出呢。

　　Of course, because no one wanted to make the birthday boy pay, we ended up subsidizing that person’s rather expensive meal as well, which is not fair to those who ordered what they could afford.

　　当然，没人愿意独自为生日聚会买单。最终都是众人筹资为昂贵的帐单付钱。这对那些只点了自己能负担的东西的人来说，是不公平的。

　　Honestly, I am getting to the point where splitting the bill might be a deal breaker for dining out with people.

　　坦白说，我觉得和别人一起进餐却平分帐单真的是大煞风景。

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